~ Happy 27th Birthday to
* The neutrality and factual accuracy of this claim, and of all subsequent ones, is hotly disputed.**
**...by which I mean disputed by tons of extreeemely hot girls, in a mud-wrestling tournament, in my backyard.

(Question - What kind of an idiot thinks that's funny? Cuz it's not...it's freakin HOT!!! And c'mon, it's obviously a joke anyway--I live in an APARTMENT; I don't even HAVE a backyard...which means the girls would have to wrestle each other on my enormous balcony instead, making sure not to knock over any of the statues I had commissioned of myself, or else they'll be disqualified immediately!!! I make for a VERY unapologetic referee; I believe it's part of being a Leo 0;-)
And check out the orange border! NNNICE!!! That's my favorite color!
You know, Leos usually like yellow, orange, and red--the colors of fire!!! YEAH!!!
ToTAL StAR PoWeR!!!! <:-O !
Oh yeah, there he is: Mr. America. A charismatic and ambitious unstoppable young man with effortlessly marketable talents, truly unique in the fact that he nobly devotes his WHOLE LIFE to nothing but the unrelenting quest for global super-STARDOM, and all to fight against the alternative route, which would a life of solitary super-BOREDOM! :-D And, might I add, it's a war he wages with consistent success; thus, he actually "lives out" his answer to the question: "Is not life a thousand times too short for us to bore ourselves??" (Nietzsche)... Well hey--what can I say? As you can see, this young man right here is probably the most image-conscious--nay, image-OBSESSED person you will ever see--probably the most self-aggrandizing, narcissistic, attention-starved egomaniac--yes, EVEN by 2007 American standards, and reality-TV standards, and even by the standards of "the Age of First-Person Singular," yes this Warholian-Orwellian-Utopian, excuse me, Youtopian iGeneration we are all now a part of. It's the Age of [get ready for the rabbit-ear quotes]--ahem, The Age of everyone having what they each call "My" "Space" on that "Dot Com" thingamabopper known as the "Inter" "Net." ... Okay, wait, let's step back and figure out what I'm saying here for a second, okay?? (re-reads..) Okay, so you mean to tell me that this is nothing but just another instance of some totally vacuous idiot glorifying himself?? Well, um, hasn't, like, the desire for self-glorification rooted itself so deeply, and ever-increasingly, in the modern collective psyche that that sort of thing is inevitable for any anonymous nincompoop looking to become visible for any reason? Ah, the vanity of human wishes! (to quote the title of that fine Samuel Johnson poem.) What a maroooon, as Bugs Bunny would say. Wait, I meant as "Bugs" "Bunny" would say. (Foo-Foo.) Well, I mean, that's not EXACTLY what I'm doing, I'm not exalting myself, but rather beauty and art and culture! Right? Well, eh heh heh, it's close enough... But if I call myself a nerd, does that make my intentions any more admirable? No? Okay, just checkin'...
The V.I.P. is COLD, baby.
One of the many sparkling mountain-peaks in the history of Culture (definitely with a capital C this time around).

Now really...that's taste! Deeeeeee-LISH!!!! :-DDD
To call either of these following women "lovely-looking ladies" would be like calling Monet "a waterlily painter" or Beethoven "a film soundtrack producer" or Shakespeare "an early Hollywood screenwriter" (or something).
Note the eyebrow... awww yeah........
(Above, far left) What appears to be a 1937 Rolls Royce + What appears to be a 2007 Stretch Cadillac =
~ The incomparable, inimitable Excalibur Superstretch Limousine ~
Whoa, AMAZING. That car does the exact same thing IIIII wanna do (gett extreeemely hot gurlzzzzz, that iz....)
But ALSO, it does that whole 'renewing of classic taste for the present-day' concept that I'm constantly blabbing about and doing here on this site to the best of my ability with art and fashion and literary pieces... So, YAHHH, you can have your stretch SUV's, but I'm still all about C-A-R's, BABY. But really, I'll tell you what - When I get around to starting my own personal auto collection, I think I'll make it about 2/3 cars and about 1/3 trucks. (SEE? I'm THAT open-minded. I'm The Fashioniste, baby! The Fashioniste is an all-inclusive type of guy, y'know. I mean, you have GOT to respect that...seriously.) Now go put on your Sunday Best and get your Sundae Spoon.
Yeah, that right up there? That's my freezer: Door No. 1 is ice cream bars, Door 2 has got "the pints,", and Door 3's got the full gallons :D, and then...there here we have a vehicle I never though I'd see, let alone drive--let alone illegally park: yes, it really is mind-boggling! Once again, grasp this concept: A classic car combined with strrrrretch limo...WHAAAT!!?!? Ok, I'm kidding--I've never driven that, and as for the violation of any parking regulations? It was already 1 second after midnight, so just chill the f^ck out and enjoy your pint of Cinammon Dulche de Leche or your Mango Sorbet, ya stupit f^ck. And yes, those are your ONLY choices, my friend. And if you try sneakin' out with a little Macadamia Nut Brittle or some Belgian Chocolate, I WARN you, I can not be held accountable for my actions... but in all actuality, I'd probably just offer you some toppings... XD! Oo-la-la. You say Pineapple Coconut? Try Noix de Coco-Ananas. To quote one French speaker about that flavor: "J'adore l'association!" Oui, it's good company, indeed.
But for now? I just got 2 words for all o' you: Chocolatechip Cookiedough.
Next order! -- of BUSINESS, that is:
~ The Fashioniste's OWN Lookalikes ~
That's me, Fall 2006, shortly before I got the initial idea to do these picture galleries online for the world, instead of just the scotch-taped magazine-page collages I had always putting up on my wall before then--and that photo was my main picture for the first couple of months of my page, before I extended it to this official site you now peruse. Then there's a self-portrait from Polish painter Stanisław Wyspiański (pr."Stanislav Vipsiansky"), 1898. Nice hairstyle(?)
Okay, see this next guy? lol. Hah. Who the hell am I kidding... I can't look THAT bad-ass, but I'll tell you this--I just might have to hire this guy when a network TV station approaches me with the offer to make a documentary about [PICTURE THIS GUY SAYING IT >] "...my impact on the early-21st-century pan-global Zeitgeist and cultural ethos, which, I'll have you know, was undeniably created in part by the artisto-intellectual cyber-revolution that I single-handedly heralded..." Damn, that screenwriter got just a BIT carried away with that characterization of me, don't you think?? Geez. I ain't that dramatic OR that full of myself. I'm no authority on anything, I'm just a lover of beauty (and my own handsomeness--but in viewing a guy like this as a supposed "lookalike" of myself, I think you could say it's a sort of "projected narcissism," like, a case of Dorian Gray Syndrome by Proxy, if you will), but this is all just one big expression of a feeling--of joy, and appreciation, and enthusiasm--and I wouldn't want anyone to think too highly of me--what a joke! All I wish to do is inspire and that's it! So...zzzzzzing! As it has been said: "A bird sings because it has a song, not because it knows the answer" (Chinese proverb); and Aesthetics, with the capital A--that is, the science of aesthetics, of theory and all the so-called "schools" of criticism--Aesthetics is to an artist what ornithology is to a BIRD.... (paraphrase of a line from 20th C American painter Barnett Newman). But as for this guy right here? He is but a stylistic and sartorial "quotation" from the lexicon of Roberto Cavalli's Fall 2007 Menswear Line.
Me, Spring 2006, and one of Italian painter Amadeo Modigliani (pr. "Modiliani")'s portraits of his friend,
a Polish poet and art dealer (ahem-hem) by the name of Léopold Zborowski, 1918.
Oh, what's up, dude? Looks like you're doin' pretty good for yourself... ;-D (From Kris Van Assche, Fall 2007)
HAHAAAA, don't be alarmed--I'm rarely so sad as this painting would seem to say. Rather, this is just me sitting at my computer, thinking, thinking, thinking!!! That is how the inspiration materializes! "Der Komponist, [The Composer] Seele von Udo Jürgens," by German-Austrian female painter Dagmar Anders, 1992.
And... Ah YES! The inspiration hath arrived... 1% inspiration, 99% perspiration, like Edison said.
"Artysta i Muza" [Arist and Muse], by Polish painter Jacek Malczewski [pr. "Yatsek Malchevsky"], c. 1890.
Oh yeah, back to THIS guy... What the hell kind of place does someone like that live in? Let's take a look, shall we?
One side of my bedroom--this was taken from the loft bed; what you see there is the guest bed--and then we have "Wohnzimmer in Neulengbach" [Living Room in ~], by early-20th C Austrian painter Egon Schiele ("Sheeluh"), 1911.
"La chambre de Van Gogh à Arles" (Van Gogh's Room at Arles [pr. "Arl"]), 1889 -- Arles was the city in the south of France where Van Gogh spent many years developing his unmistakable style. And to the right of that room is the OTHER side of mine. It is not so improbable that the excessively extravangant and luxury-loving world of my mind should reside itself in a a very simple and almost spartan surroundings. I am already overwhelmed by the material and the physical world enough as it is! I wouldn't generalize and say that all artists "have sensitive senses," but I know I certainly do. But to go ahead and make a different generalization, he 19th C German philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer said in his 1851 essay, "On Women": "The vanity of women, even though it should not prove to be greater than that of men, has this much danger in it, that it takes an entirely material direction. They are vain, I mean, of their personal beauty, and then of finery, show and magnificence. ... But with men vanity often takes the direction of non-material advantages, such as intellect, learning, courage." And might I point out that the word "courage" itself is from Old French word for heart, "corage," which, in turn, is from the Latin word "cor," also meaning heart. And I got more heart than money can buy! And I should hope more intellect and learning, too! (Hey, get that actor in here who's gonna play the role of me in my life story--he'll sound a hell of a lot more believable and, quite frankly, cooler in sayin' this sorta stuff. But me? I just sound like a motormouth, an outboard motormouth, an overboard ... )
Hey! IKEA is actually where I GOT my couch! lol!
Egon Schiele, 1914; me, 2007; and Ukrainian model Snejana (j = "zh") Onopka, backstage at Gucci, Fall 2007.


And NOW...
Inside the belly--um, the electrically circuited, microprocessing, multi-multi-tasking, polysilicon-n'-aluminum belly of the fashion-following, art-worshipping, literature-studying, flower-sniffing...BEAST?? Yeah, that's me, all right! But wait! What's happened?? All those pictures of sizzlin' hot models have caused my hard-drive to literally CATCH FIRE!!! That's what happened! <:-o WOOPS... [sorrowful trumpet sound]
404 File Not Found
And wait, what's THIS?--
.404 Carat Tennis Bracelet Not Bought For YOU, Sister >:-P
Oh that is SO wrong. How u guh play a nouveau riche Fifth Avenue socialite LIKE DAT? Pshhh...
Yes, this is an emergency that MUST be taken care of...
Well phew! - Here we go! Computer maintenance expert to the rescue! 8^D
Behold - The main thing that contributes to the making of this here website:
(...though I don't quite understand what actually goes in the whole area under those keys...but anyway.)
Uh-oh. You know what comes next...
And yes, I believe that look means everything is up and running! And the result? As unforgettable as it is priceless! (I'm uh, still talkin' about my website here. But she's looks très élégante too...or uh, wuatévèr.)
AI love working on this site, and I love the feedback I get from all of you; the comments and critiques, the requests, and suggestions and wide variety of questions all make this even more of a source of joy and activity for me, and I thank you! And like anyone in this day and age who loves what they do, I have at least a bit of common sense,






...and I make sure to back up everything onto CD, and so should you! >>
How long have I thought and felt and acted this way? Well, there's no other way I've ever been! See for yourself >>
That is from SEVERAL years ago... Yup, taking a picture in the mirror, way before MySpace made the "cellf-portrait" something that every single high school student to twenty-something person has at least two-dozen of, and which every one of 'em has shared at least three-dozen of. And my expression, par usual, is about as delightfully easy to read as that young lady's! XD I am actually quite a dreadfully humorless fellow, you know... It has been that the late 19th C Norwegian playwright Henrik Ibsen was "nothing more than a pen," as contrasted with what Irish playwright Oscar Wilde said of himself, which was that he put all of his genius into his personality, and was comparatively not much himself his writings... Well, I assure you, I AM just a pen. Or rather a mouse. [thinking deeply...] I'm just a mouse. But! I hastily point out--I'm just a mouse in real life! In the realm of art, where I live and shack up with all the trappings of 3000 years of art and literature, I'm a cat, a lion, a f^ckin' big ferocious LION!!!! But uhh...let's just ignore the fact that in the actual animal kingdom, it's the lionesses who do all the hunting while the lions just lounge around all day like a buncha lazy, unemployed, spoiled-ass freeloaders they are. I mean, what kind of life is THAT?!? I'll stick with the mythological portrayal of the mighty, roaring lion, thank you very much. And in that, I do NOT include Aesop's Fable of "The Lion in Love," where the poor feline de-claws himself in order to get permission to date the farmer's daughter, only to then be driven off by the farmer with as pitchfork...'cuz that is so NOT my story, man....
Anyway, this is me from last summer, some five years after that previous one. And the female juxtaposed with me is, once again, Snejana Onopka, at Valentino, Fall 2007 Ready-to-Wear. What a heavy, haunting stare....
Still at it...
Yeah...dude? That might've been impressive in like, 1997. Put it DOWN already--or at least put a shirt over that...
Ah yeah! And we're BACK!
So that's what I've done and continue to do, and I hope you like it! ;-). Check out this next comparison-- Nice freakin' smile! Ha. That right there is American model Lindsay Ellingson, backstage at Christian Dior, Fall 2006 Ready-to-Wear. And that's me, another American model, but not a fashion model--just a self-styled model of "Hyperintellectual Superficiality," that phrase I coined and the concept that I see exemplified in so many great writers and artists and designers of the past--and the present! After all, we must acknowledge that those who shaped the past are those who shape the present, and the future--and so none of them are really relegated to their own time, you know: "He who influences the thoughts of his times, influences all the times that follow. He has made his impress on eternity" --early-5th-century Greek woman philosopher Hypatia (pr. "Hypayshia")--and, the funny thing is, that quote is recorded both in the male form and the female form, but I will say that it was most likely in the female form, and that in my quoting of itI have switched it to suit myself. But annnnyway, how much creative mileage can I GET out of this picture?? (That remains to be seen...!)
SO. . . What is this little site of mine ("I'm gonna let it shine")
- -ANSWER- -
~ * ~ ! ~ * ~
Five Music Videos - Some of my true favorites!!! Enjoy!
Note: If these don't play right away, I have provided the URLs in a list at the bottom.
P. Lion - "Happy Children" - This is okayyy... I just think the guy kinda resembles me, T. Lion! :-P > :-T
Ryan Paris - "Dolce Vita" - This one is very classy. And I think this guy resembles me in both his finesse and his sort of blasé savoir-faire (and that is to say nothing of his nonchalance or insouciance !). It is that je-ne-sais-quoi français. But, well, je ne suis pas French! But how does he live in the sweet life in Italian, hmm?? Touché, wuatévèr.
Melanie C - "Next Best Superstar" & "I Turn To You" (Live in Copenhagen) - BOTH AWESOME!!!!
Soft Cell - "Secret Life" - One commenter said: "They wrote songs that were different and relevant--about frustration, lost youth, one-room apartments, and suburban hypocrisy." Yeah, but who the hell identifies with that stuff? <:-\
Melanie C - "Northern Star" - Oh...
- Links -
P. Lion - "Happy Children"
Ryan Paris - "Dolce Vita"
Melanie C - "Next Best Superstar" & "I Turn To You"
Soft Cell - "Secret Life"
Melanie C - "Northern Star"
:-) Thanks! ~The Fashioniste~
P.S. - A bit of poetry I call this:
See that sign on the tree?
Well, that sign
Means nothing
To me.